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feminine un-intuition.

July 14, 2010

so basically since the day i found out we are pregnant
i’ve believed (without cause or evidence) that i was carrying a boy.

i think primarily i was going by two very unscientific deductions:
1. most of my girlfriends have had girls recently, so the boy is inside me.
2. my mom had a boy first and justin came from all boy land so he probably sent a Y my way.

that’s why much to his chagrin,
i’ve been pestering justin just about every single week
with a new boy name possibility and deciding a week later that
i no longer liked such and such previous name.
because i felt pretty panicky that i didn’t really like any boy names for very long.
meanwhile, justin would feel settled on one choice,
and then be aggravated when i’d say i was taking it off the table
for no reason other than my own whims.

on the other hand
the girl name we both love had been settled on since maybe
oh, probably the day after we found out we were pregnant.

i wanted a family name with some depth and meaning
but also one that we both like of course
and my great grandmother’s name was elsie
well actually it was lillian elsie but she went by elsie,
and we both love it.

then i love love birds and i wanted a girl to be named after a little bird
so we picked wren for her middle name.
i don’t think justin much cared what her middle name would be
though he did veto certain suggestions and chose wren as his favorite.
there is an irish folk tale about a wren having more wit than an eagle
and you can google that if you want.
today justin observed that her initials are the same as that of
newark international airport,
which is probably the best thing it has going for it.

anyway though i was so sure that name had to
stay locked in the vault for two years at the least until a girl came along…
in fact i was nervous that by some chance some friend would use it.

well at 13 weeks the doctor said he
would guess it was a boy
based on the slow heartbeat and something that he saw…
so i got maybe a little arrogant about knowing my baby.

and i carried on with my searches in boy nameville.

but at 17 weeks he saw nothing and
retracted his guess and said,
i really can’t say either way.

finally now at 24 weeks
we got in for our first american ultrasound.

and last night
on the eve of the BIG REVEAL ultrasound
i could not sleep for the life of me
i tossed and turned and fretted
and ended on a small epiphany-
or anyway, a new feeling:
this isn’t a boy at all, that’s why i don’t like any boy names,
this is baby elsie wren and it’s about time i quit calling her, he.

and so she is.
the tech said right away, this is a girl, see.

and then in the next shot,
elsie wren had something to say:

i think that’s for me calling her a boy for 6 months,
when she’s really just an athletic female with a low heartbeat and plenty of attitude.
that’s definitely justin’s daughter.
and neither one of us can wait to meet her.
but that is the last time she makes an obscene hand gesture at us and it goes unpunished!

now the last thing i must say on the matter is this:
i’ve been a little critical of people who announce their baby’s names pre-delivery,
saying things like, “but they haven’t seen or gotten to know the baby yet.”
but today
i just knew she is elsie and always has been,
so i retract my criticism and eat my own words as usual.

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2 Comments leave one →
  1. July 14, 2010 23:06

    That’s definitely your kid, Elisaberh.

    Elsie’s one tough chickadee.

  2. Grammy permalink
    July 14, 2010 23:23

    we can’t wait to meet little elsie wren either. she will surely be the joy of your lives.

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